Why so unfair?

To a certain extent, I do feel being taken advantage of. It’s as though when I am being called to serve for worship naturally for one at night and the next early morning. they did not consider that I am doing so for Sunday’s as well. But I asked the Lord, God why like that? Am I supposed to fight for my rights and say I ain’t going for it? I can be tired too… Serving on sat, sun and the next week, the same thing happens. It’s not as though I am slacking, but truly want to rest and do my work too.

Lord you showed me how ugly my heart is. Bothering and focusing only on myself… And what hit me most when He asked me this:

“Simply put, if you’re not willing to take what is dearest to you, whether plans or people, and kiss it good–bye, you can’t be my disciple.
-Luke 14:33 (MSG)

To think I just went for sanctification weekend, and praying to deny our rights- to earthly things… Aka time, plans, etc. So I resolved things and truly dedicate myself, after counting my cost, that I have decided to serve and follow Jesus.

Deadline(s)

- this week’s lesson plan
- lesson plan for assignment
- write up for assignment
- decorate class (photos for assignment)
- teacher-made learning centres
- different subject learning corners

Mm, this list doesn’t seem as long as I thought? Assignment down first! Gee, my other deadline up is next week… Whether I should leave pebbles a not! Truthfully, I really want to stay and make sure I do a better job than this year and to prove that I am a testimony to my colleagues..

But recently, I got 2 job offers from different places. But God, I thought it you really want me to change then allow there to be a vacancy and recruitment for Julia Gabriels! Cause I really dream of going there to work! Well, if word gets around and I do hear, then I know it’s time for me to leave where I am now. It’s really contradicting cause now I really wanna stay to prove that I can do a better job and missing my kids already! But yet, I really wanna just not be so focused on working full time so I can lean driving, piano etc..

Lord, give me a clearer picture of what I want please! Before 19th!

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